


I Still Love You

by Soliepower



Category: Reign (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2018-12-10 02:04:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11681733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soliepower/pseuds/Soliepower
Summary: Falling in love with your best friend, what a cliche. Despite that, it’s understandable. A best friend is there for it all. The ups, the downs. They see you at your best and at your worst. I can see how it’s so easy to fall into that trap. After all, I did. Francis/Mary Modern Day-AU





	1. Age 5-Pools of Blue

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first Reign story I have ever written so I hope it turns out the way I would like it to. I also haven't written a story in over 6 years so I am still getting into the swing of things. 
> 
> Currently I am working full time and will be going back to school full time so updates may not come as quick as I would like. I am aiming for one update every 2 weeks. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Reign or any of the characters present in this story.

      This story will contain voice-over style narrations in italics that provide an introduction to each chapter as well as information not present in the chapter itself. The first chapter's format may be a little confusing but will get easier to understand over the coming chapters.

* * *

 

      _Falling in love with your best friend, what a cliché._

_I_ _t happens in all the romance movies and teen dramas. Boy and girl are best friends for years before one realizes they love the other which sets off a series of events that cause pain, drama and in most cases, end in a declaration of love and a kiss over the ocean or at prom or at a wedding—something just as cheesy._

_Despite how cliché it is, it’s understandable. A best friend is there for it all. The ups, the downs. They see you at your best and at your worst. I can see how it’s so easy to fall into that trap._

_After all, I did it. I fell madly, head-over-heels in love with my best friend, and it’s hard to pinpoint the exact moment that happened._

_Looking back, it was always him. I was always meant to choose him._

* * *

 

_Francis and I met when we were just 5 years old. My father was the head of a company that he founded in his childhood bedroom at the age of 16._

_My dad, he was the stereotypical hard worker. A high school drop-out, he worked the overnight shift at 24 hour drive-thru and worked on his internet start-up during the day. The internet was just starting to be a thing when he was 16 and he saw it as a marketable instance. By the time he was 18 his shipping company was worth 5 million dollars._

_By the time he met my mother he was worth more than he could have ever imagined growing up in lower-class Scotland._

_Henry Valois joined the company when I was 5. Henry was always a large imposing man. His booming voice and intense stare won him any room he entered, yet the love he had for his family overcame the fear he struck within me. The Valois name allowed Henry to rise in the ranks and within 6 months he was named vice president and his family was forever thrust upon mine._

* * *

 

     “But mama, I don’t want to go to another party. I’m sick of going to parties. They’re so boring.”

      My mother rolled her eyes and tossed the dress in her hand to the bed. Pink ruffles and white taffeta puffed up on my duvet and a pair of shiny black shoes soon landed beside it.

     “Mary, for the last time you are going. This is an important party for your father.”

     “But its all grown-ups talking. I wanna play with my toys here. Daddy won’t mind.”

     It was true. Even at 5 years old I knew what I meant to my father. As his only child, he would bend at my every whim. It took one bat of the eye and he would give in.

     “Mary, this is not negotiable." Her French accent became more obvious, as it always done when she was angry and she walked out the door allowing Genevieve, my nanny to enter.

      “Come on Missy. Time to get dressed.” I rolled my eyes and huffed, crossing my arms.

      “Missy, there will be some new members of your father’s company there tonight. I heard that one of them has a son your age.”

     Silence.

     “Missy….” That was it. That one word broke me. No matter how stubborn I was, Genevieve’s simple tone and even simpler nickname snapped my barrier and I gave in.

     “Fine. But not that dress!”

     Half an hour later I found me walking at Genevieve’s side down the stairs of our home to the party. My mother and father were the first people to see me. My father’s face transforming into a large smile, eyes beaming. My mother frowned and her eyes took in the dress I had picked out in place of hers. It was a simple purple slip dress that had a matching head band wrapped around my head. I jumped to the bottom stair as my father lifted me into his arms.

     “There she is. The entire party was waiting for you my darling.” He rubbed his hand across my belly and I giggled into his neck.

     “Daddy put me down!”

      “What? Why would I do that? You are my princess and all princesses deserve to be carried on royal thrones.”

     I pulled my head from his neck and looked at him, eyes still beaming.

     “Daddy you’re so silly.” He laughed a laugh deep from his belly and set me back on the ground. “Marie, she look’s beautiful tonight does she not?”

      My mother stepped toward me and patted down my hair, now sticking up at ends from being buried in my father’s neck. “Yes, however Ginny where is the dress I chose for her?” Genevieve stepped forward and reached for my hand, “When we put it on, I found a rather large hole in the back, we were forced to select this in its place.”

      Mother nodded and went to the bar in the corner of the room. Genevieve and I shared a secretive smile as my father reached for my hand.

     “Come now Mary, there is someone I would like you to meet.”

     “Daddy I hate meeting your friends. They’re all old and boring.” He laughed at my scrunched up face and continued to lead me to the center of the room.

     “Oh but this someone a little bit younger than me. I think he may even be 5 years old!”

      “But that’s my age!”

      “Well, that is your age isn’t it?” I was so focused on beaming up at him that I hadn’t realized we stopped moving.

      “Mary, I would like to introduce you to Henry and Catherine Valois. Henry just started working for me.” I smiled up at the adults looking down at me. Henry was so tall and Catherine so cold. They were both smiling but there was no warmth behind the smiles.

     “And these are they’re children Sebastian and Francis.” I smiled at the boys and I heard Catherine mutter something about Bash being Henry’s only. I heard the words but didn’t take them in as I stared at the boy in front of me. Bright blue eyes, beaming smile and a head of blonde curls.

     Francis.

      He smiled brightly at me and waved so I waved back.

     “Hi.”

     “Hi.”

     Cough, cough.

     My eyes left the pool of blue and took in the deep emeralds next to them.

     “I’m Bash.” He said.

     “Hi, I’m Mary. How old are you?”

     “I’m 8.”

     “Well I’m 5.”

     “Me too!” My father chuckled above me.

     “Mary, why don’t the three of you go up to the playroom. I’ll have Ginny bring you all up something to eat and drink.”

     “Okay!” I reached forward and latched onto Francis’ hand and led him and Bash up the stairs past my bedroom, into the playroom.

     “I have all kinds of toys. Blocks, puzzles, dolls—but I’m sure you guys won’t want to play with those—trucks, coloring books, regular books—“

     “I can play with anything you want to. Bash will probably read.” I turned to the corner where Bash was sitting in a chair and saw Francis was right. Bash had pulled one of the books off the shelf and was quietly reading.

     “We can play marbles.” I offered.

     “Okay!” I attempted to teach Francis marbles as he laughed and flopped his way through the game. Every once in a while Bash would peer over at us, now on a new book, and chuckle at the pair of us. Genevieve brought up food and drinks and Francis and I shared cookies and chocolate milk as he flung my marbles throughout the entire room.

     “I’m sorry, I lost all of the marbles.”

     “It’s okay. I have more in my room. Come with me.” I grabbed his hand once more and pulled him back down the hall to my room.

     “Wow! This is your room?”

     “Mmmhmm.”

     “Mine is almost this big. But mine is blue.”

     “My mom wanted it to be pink. I like purple, but she’s my mom so I have to do what she says.” I shrug and pull out a new bag of marbles from my dresser. I turn to see Francis perched on my bed, pillow in hand.

     “Hey, do you ever pillow fight?” I shook my head.

     “What’s that?”

     “It’s easy. See?” The pillow in his hand moved forward and smacked the side of my head. His eyes were wide in fear as I didn’t respond.

     “I’m sorry. That’s part of the game. Did I hurt you? I’m really sorry.” His eyes began to water.

     I slowly took a step forward and yanked the pillow from his hand. Before giving it a second thought I smacked the pillow against his head, a beaming smile on my face. He smiled back, the tears gone and reached for anther pillow. I climbed on the bed beside him and began an assault. Laughter and shrieking filled the room as Francis and I hit each other with the pillows that my mother so meticulously picked out. Somewhere along the way both of the pillows ripped and feathers began falling through the air. Francis was the first to notice and picked up a pile of feathers that gathered and dropped them on my head.

     “You’re not like other girls!” He laughed, cheeks rosey and eyes glazed.

     “What do you mean?”

      “You’re fun!”  

      “You are too!”

      As more feathers rained down I heard several sets of footsteps approach the room. Francis must have heard it at the same time as his eyes got wide with panic.

     “Marie Antionette Stuart! What have you done?” Mother’s French accent was back.

     “I—we were just--.” “It was my fault—.” Francis and I stated at the same time.

     “Oh, Francis! What is wrong with you?” Catherine’s voice cut in.

      “James, I am so sorry. He gets like this sometimes, so uncontrollable.” Henry pitched in.

     “Everyone calm down. They are just pillows. Did you two have fun?” My father chuckled. We silently nodded.

      “Well Francis, it’s time for you to head home. Why don’t you help Mary clean up the playroom and come down stairs.”

      Francis nodded and took my hand as we brushed past all of the frazzled adults and went back down the hallway.

      “I like you Mary.”

      “I like you too.”

       “Can we be friends.”

       “Only the best.”


	2. Age 8 & 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the formatting in this chapter is still going to be a little weird. Just to explain it, in the upcoming chapters the POV is Mary and it will be in the voice of the age she is. Meaning-if she is 11 in the story it will be told in the voice of 11 year old Mary. The only few chapters where that will not be the case is chapter 1 (age 5) and this chapter just because I feel like doing the voice of a 5-7 year old is weird. The italics are still meant as an overview narration. I just wanted to get that out of the way.
> 
> This story is also being published on Fanfiction.net. I will likely update the story there first so if you enjoy the story and frequent that site, keep an eye out.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Reign or any of the characters featured in this story.
> 
> Without further ado...enjoy.

_From the moment Francis and I met, our lives were forever intertwined. There was no way of knowing what was to come when we were 5, but looking back I feel like the signs were always there. We were just too blind to see them._

_There were times where I felt as if Francis was the only one who cared, or was the one to make everyone else care._

_He was the one who would hold me as I cried, who would wipe my tears. He knew I cried even hours later, with just one look._

_He was the other half of my heart from day one._

* * *

**Age 8**

Mom and dad were gone again. A trip to Scotland to 'fix a major screw-up' as dad said. It was third time this month. The first to England, the second to Italy and now back to Scotland.

Its okay. I was used to it at this point.

Dad had a lot on his plate and as the boss he had to be there when something went wrong.

I just wish that mom would stay once, or maybe they would bring me with them.

But I was used to it.

Before they left dad kissed my cheeks as always and held my open palms. "My sweet princess. We will only be gone a mere three days. You will hardly notice that we are even gone."

I silently nodded, my eyes on the ground in hopes to keep the tears back.

"I promise my darling, we will be back before Thursday."

I nodded once again.

"Tell you what, I will be bringing you several gifts this time. Is there anything in particular you would like?"

"Just that you are back before Thursday. Will you please be back before Thursday? Please."

His hand cupped my face, "I swear to you on my life my princess. Be good for the Valois' okay, I will call you every night before you go to bed." He placed a gentle kiss to the top of my head and pulled me into his arms. "I love you."

"I love you too daddy."

He turned from me and made his way to the car outside the Valois home as he pulled out his cell phone. My eyes moved to my mother who had remained silent during the interaction between my father and I.

"Be on your best behavior. Catherine will notify me if anything goes wrong while we are away. Remember you are representing this family. Behave."

I nodded. "Yes, mother."

Mother looked up to Catherine, who was standing just behind me in the entry to their home. "We should be back no later than Sunday."

Catherine simply nodded, but my head shot up. "But daddy said you would be back by Thursday."

"I know, but the spa I love so dearly had an opening and I would like to spend decent time there. Goodbye my darling."

She turned and started to make her way down the pathway to the car waiting for her. I moved as fast as I could after her, hearing Catherine shuffle behind me, attempting to keep up.

"Take me with you then, please. Just this once. I promise I will behave. Just please!" I reached for her, but my mother never turned back. As the car door slammed shut Catherine's arms reached out for me, her hands pulling on my waist.

"Come my child. Francis is waiting for you upstairs. He got a new toy just for you to play with."

"But-." The car was already gone as the tears started.

"Shh. I know. I know." Catherine lifted me in the air the best she could lift a 7 year old and brought me inside, to the kitchen. My face was buried in her neck as I let the tears flow faster. My breathing began to pick up and she gently set me down on a stool for the kitchen's island. "It will be alright Mary. Your father said he would call every night and would try and be home by Thursday. Perhaps it is your mother only who will be staying long." She handed me juice box and a bowl of chocolate covered pretzels-the only thing she knew would calm me down. "Now, wipe those tears. You know that Francis would be heart broken to see those pink cheeks."

I nodded as she patted my cheek before going to another room of the house, leaving me on my own. Why couldn't they take me with them just this one time? It was different from all the others. Why not just this once?

I was used to staying with the Valois' when they were gone. It in most cases, was something I actually looked forward to. Spending more time with Francis, Bash and their sister Elisabeth was something I loved. Catherine always smiled at me and Henry made sure that I always had what I needed. I usually didn't mind it.

But this time was different. And everyone knew that.

After eating only a few pretzels and my entire juice box I made my way up the spiraling stairs and turned to the left; past Bash's room, past Claude's nursery all the to the end of the hall.

Francis' room was the smallest of all of the rooms, but was the one with the most fun. It was painted deep blue with hand prints in rainbow colors around the lower half of the room. They were our hands. Twice a year since we were 5 Francis and I would paint our hands in a different color and place them against the blue, side-by-side. Bookshelves and toy chests were lined against another wall with a small couch beside them. Francis' bed was in the center of the room with a table to the left of it where we would color and play marbles.

The door squeaked open and I saw Francis' head dart up. He was sitting at the table, colored pencils in hand. "You're here!" He jumped from the chair rand forward, skidding to a stop a few steps before me. His eyes took in my face, "What's wrong?"

I shrugged, "Nothing. I missed you. It's been a whole three days since I saw you." I moved past him to sit on his bed. He stayed silent a moment before he finally turned around.

"Are you sure nothings wrong?" He moved to sit beside me.

I nodded once again. "I just, my mom said they won't be back until Sunday. She wants to go to the spa. But my dad said they would be back by Thursday."

"Well, Today is only Saturday. There is plenty of time for them to come back. Last time they were only gone for three days."

"Yeah, but my mother said-"

"But your dad said something different. And your dad never lies. He always keeps his promises right?"

"Yeah, I guess so. He's never broken a promise before."

"Plus I'll be here. Hey I got a new bag of marbles. Wanna play?"

"Sure."

* * *

 

My father managed to keep one of his promises as he called me every night before bed. Each night he would tell me of the roaring hills he saw outside his office window and each night I would ask him when they would be returning, only to have him avoid the answer. Deep down, from the first phone call I knew.

Francis always sat beside me as I was on the phone. Each time he would hear me sigh, he would reach out and take hold of my hand, clutching it tight. By the end of each call he would pull me close, one arm around my should and would tell me a story as I silently cried.

Each night Catherine would enter the room to tuck us in the bed together, smiling silently. I had my own room but with how every phone call went, Catherine would relent and would allow me to stay with Francis. We never had to ask, she just did it.

Thursday morning I woke up in the bed alone. My brow furrowed as I took in the room. Francis never woke up before me, if he was allowed he would sleep until noon. The clock on his bedside table read 7 am.

"Francis?" I called, my voice coarse from sleep. I pushed the covers back and stepped out of the bed, shivering as my bare feet hit the chilled hardwood floor, stretching my arms above my head I called for Francis once again.

Silence.

I moved out of the bedroom, to the bathroom and started to brush my teeth as my ears strained to hear anything from within the house. All I found was more silence. Where was everyone?

Panic began to consume me. Had they left me too? It was impossible. Francis was my best friend, my partner in everything. Catherine doted on me as if I was one of her own, she cared for me more than she did Bash. But those were her own reasons.

Even at 7 I understood that.

They would never leave me would they? My parents did regularly, for their own reasons of course, but they still left me.

Why wouldn't the Valois'?

Leaving the bathroom I moved down the halls and down that spiral staircase, towards the kitchen. As I moved through the home, I saw Larie the house keeper and nodded towards her as she did the same.

"Good morning Ms. Stuart."

"Hello Laurie." Brushing past her, I turned to see her face transform into a tiny smile, one that I wasn't meant to see.

I stopped completely when I reached the kitchen.

There stood the entire Valois family gathered around the kitchen island, standing in front the most food I had ever seen. There were hash browns, eggs-in every way imaginable, bacon, sausages, croissants, fresh fruit, yogurt; you name it it was there. Along with pitchers of orange and apple juice.

But what struck me, what brought the tears to my eyes were the decorations. Purple and green balloons were crowding the entire kitchen, streamers of the same color fluttered from the ceiling. A banner was hung in the corner reading, "Joyeux anniversaire Mary!"

"Happy birthday!" Everyone yelled in unison.

My hands went to cover my mouth as I felt my cheeks burn. Francis ran forward and gathered me into his arms, Bash following behind.

"I'm sorry Mary, we didn't mean to make you cry."

I shook my head, "It's okay. I was just surprised. Thank you!" I looked around to everyone as I extracted myself from Francis' arms and was pulled into Bash's.

At ten years old he was much taller than me and my face was pushed just above his waist.

"Happy birthday Mary."

"Thank you Bash. Thank you everyone." Catherine was next to gather me into her arms.

"It was all Francis' idea."

Henry nodded down to me with a smile on his own face. "Happy birthday Mary. I have to go to work, otherwise I am sure your father wouldn't be too happy with me, but enjoy your day. There is a lot planned for you." I nodded my head, reaching out for a strip of bacon as he exited the kitchen, each child receiving a pat on the head and Catherine receiving a nod.

"Mary, we are going to have so much fun today. Mother is taking us to the Eiffle Tower and then to the Arc De Triomphe before we will have a picnic in the Parc des Buttes-Chaumont. Mother has food arriving from your favorite cafe with all the food from their menu. All the food!" My eyes widened at his quickened pace and smile grew. "And if there is any time left, we will go to the Lourve. I know that you have been wanting to go there for some time now." I nodded as I pushed some bread into my mouth and felt Francis' hand reach for mine. Our eyes met and smiled at him. A silent thank you transferring between us. He nodded leaned forward, a single kiss pressed against my cheek.

* * *

 

Exhausted I followed Francis into his bedroom, wet from my bath and in fresh clothes, I threw myself onto his bed. The day had been long but amazing. Francis was not lying when he told me Catherine got everything from the menu of my favorite cafe. I ate so much I thought my stomach was going to explode.

Bash chased Francis and I through the trees of the park as Catherine bounced Claude on her lap and laughed at us. Francis and I danced a silent dance in the Lourve as Bash stared at a portrait of a woman and man dancing on their own.

The day was amazing from start to finish. As I felt my eyes begin to fall shut I felt Francis move beside me.

"Wait. Before you fall asleep I have one more thing for you." I sat up on the bed and looked around the room as he dashed out the door.

"Francis, you didn't have to get me anything. I know that the entire day was your idea. That is more than enough."

"I know, but I wanted to get you something else." He thrust a wrapped gift into my hands and I smiled at him. Pulling the paper from the gift I found the backside of a picture frame. Flipping it over I found it was made of Popsicle sticks painted purple and green, my favorite colors. They framed a picture of Francis and I from a year before. We were on the beach in Biarritz, his arms wrapped around my shoulder as we smiled to the camera. We both had wet sand sticking to our faces and my hair was wet and the strands were sticking in multiple directions. His blonde curls were matted down to his head and his nose was bright red.

"Thank you Francis. I love it."

"You're welcome."

I leaned over and put the frame on the bedside table, facing the bed. I crawled under the covers and closed my eyes.

The day, the gift, everything Francis did he did for me. It wasn't until the next morning that I realized my father never called. He broke two promises to me in one day, and Francis managed to distract me from all of it.

* * *

 

_That was the first time my father ever broke a promise, but it was not the last. And with every crushing heartbreak a broken promise brought, Francis was there to pick up the pieces._

_That wasn't the last time Francis distracted me as I was left abandoned by my parents on my birthday. It was just the first of many birthdays spent alone._

_Looking back now, I realize that I was never alone. Francis made sure of that. Whether it was just he and I alone, or the entire Valois family gathering around me to ensure someone celebrated with me. He made every year special._

* * *

**Age 10**

My birthday arrived faster than I expected. It was strange to think that I was going to be ten. There were days where I still felt as if I was five, but others where I felt I was much older.

It was the first birthday in three years that my parents would be spending it with me. My eight birthday they were both in Scotland. My father bought me pure white horse named Rose. My ninth birthday found my father with me but my mother in Rome on a personal vacation. Father spent the day distracting me with food and extravagant gifts. He remodeled my entire room and finished the night off with a diamond tiara.

"You are forever my princess no matter how old you get. Every princess deserves her own tiara." He told me as I unfolded the gift from tissue paper.

Francis made sure to talk his parents and my father into taking me to my favorite cafe and we bought all of our favorites. Francis gave me a hand made bracelet of purple, green, blue and gold strings-all of our favorite colors. There were four beads on the center of the strings, MS and FV.

This year I was turning ten and both my mother and father were in Paris with me. But, I still felt deep down that something would go wrong. The night before my birthday I spent texting Francis as he attempted to push my fears away, but they were there seeping their way into my brain and drowning any thoughts of hope.

**Franny Banny: It will all be ok. It's your birthday and theyre here.**

**Me: Yea I kno. But I cant shake the feeling away.**

**Franny Banny: Well kick it aside. You have a party to get ready for and I swear if you are all depressed during it I will kick you instead.**

**Me: Sure, whatever you say Franny**

**Franny Banny: If I didnt love you so much I would punch you for that.**

**Me: Sorry Franny**

**Franny Banny: Only you get to call me that.**

**Me: I know. :)**

**Franny Banny: Go to bed. I'll See you tomorrow.**

**Franny Banny: :)**

He was right. My parents were there and they were even taking their presence an extra mile and were throwing me a party. I was allowed to invite anyone I wanted. I almost laughed when my father told me that.

He leaned down, all excited after breakfast and whispered it into my ear. "Anyone in the whole wide world, you can invite."

I was home schooled. I didn't really know many people.

But I knew Greer and Lola through dance class and Kenna from acting lessons. Leith was Francis' friend from football that I met at one of his games. Bash would be there as would Elisabeth, Claude and the newest member of the Valois family, Charles.

But that was it. That was all I knew.

Their parents were invited as well but, that was it. It wasn't exactly the whole wide world, but it was all I needed.

When I woke up the morning of my birthday, I quickly dressed in a pair of leggings and a plain black t-shirt before making my way downstairs.

Workers were rushing around the entire house, hanging things here and there, pushing furniture around and pulling in tables and chairs. Caterers were rushing to the kitchen and I looked around for decorations, for anything I wanted.

When my dad told me he would be throwing me a birthday party I asked if we could have balloons and streamers-much like the Valois family did for me when I was younger-I asked for a chocolate fountain-just because I can and asked for cotton candy.

I saw none of that.

I shrugged and moved to the kitchen. It was still early in the morning, the decorating was still early on. There was plenty of time to get what I asked for ready.

My father was sitting alone at the kitchen table as my mother stood in the corner pointing caterers around, giving them orders as to where to go and what to begin making.

Escargot, mussels, roasted chicken-nothing I had hoped for.

"Good morning darling." My father looked up and saw me enter the room.

"How does it feel to be one year older?"

I shrugged. "Same as last year. Why is mom having all that food made? I thought we were going to have fries and soup and stuff I like?"

"Well some business associates will be there tonight as well so we have to have something for them too."

"Well what about the decorations? I didn't see any streamers or balloons or anything." I sat beside him after gathering some breakfast from the food Ginny prepared.

"I'm sure they will be put out later, it's still bright and early." He smiled down at me and slid something across the table to me.

"Now, open your gift." He looked at me expectantly as I open the long box. Inside was a shiny, silver charm bracelet from Tiffany & Co. The charms were of a horse head, my initials and a pair of ballet slippers.

"Thank you dad. I love it. Really."

And I did. I loved my dad, no matter how much his broken promises hurt me in the past. He always attempted to make it up to me. He never liked seeing his little girl hurt. That's what he always told me. I clasped the bracelet on my wrist beside the one from Francis and looked over to my mother.

She had finished with the workers and was looking down at her phone.

My father caught my gaze as it wondered to my mother. "Marie, enough work for now. The birthday girl has finally graced us with her presence." My mother looked over to us and sighed, moving towards me.

"Good morning my darling. Happy birthday." She dropped a kiss against the top of my head.

"I bought you a new outfit for the party tonight. It is my gift to you. Ginny will be up tonight to help you prepare. The party starts at 7. Be ready by 7:30." With that, she was gone.

* * *

The dress my mother picked out for me was everything I expected it would be. Pink, ruffly and so not me. Looking at it as it hung against my body I was reminded of the dress she attempted to get me to wear the night I first met Francis. I wished I could have hid this one like I did that one, but it was a gift. I couldn't do that.

Ginny had assisted me with my hair and left fifteen minutes before. It was still only 7:00. Mother said I didn't have to arrive until 7:30 and I wanted to hide my dress for as long as possible. I was pulled from my thoughts by a knock at the door.

"Ms. Mary, your friends are all here if you would like to come down."

I nodded fluffed my dress once more. "Lets get this over with."

"You're not excited for the party?"

"I'm not excited about this dress. The sooner I get out of it, the better." Ginny laughed and made her way down the stairs ahead of me. As I reached the top of the stairs, I froze.

Silver and metallic tables were spread around the room. A pianist was playing in one corner and servers were moving around the room with hors d'oeurves. A majority of the people in the house were my father's associates. There were around one hundred people in the room. And no decorations. It looked more like a business gathering than it did a ten year old's birthday party.

And that's when I realized that was exactly what it was.

This was no birthday party, no attempt by parents to make a child happy. It was an excuse to gather and schmooze new clients and make new deals, all under the guise of a good time.

I could already feel my face begin to burn-a telltale sign of the onset of tears. My eyes frantically searched the downstairs for the mop of blonde that I so desperately needed. But it was no where to be found. Neither was Bash or any of the Valois'. They weren't here. I was about to turn back to my room when my mother caught my eye. She wiggled her finger at me,urging me to come forward. I knew that if I turned back and made my way to my room I would hear about it later so took a deep breath, pushed the tears back and moved slowly down the stairs toward her.

"That dress looks marvelous on you darling, don't you all agree?" She looked to the crowd of adults around her who all nodded and said words of praise.

I didn't care what they thought. They didn't care about me. They just wanted my mother to see them doting on me to gain her favor. Not that it would help. A few glasses of champagne and snarky gossip was all they need for her favor. "Your friends are in the library dear. Why don't you make your way there?" With that she turned back to the adults, leaving me on my own. My father was no where to be seen, Ginny was in the kitchen with the other workers and Francis still wasn't here. I wanted to see my other friends, yes. But I needed Francis too. I took in another shaky breath and made my way to the library.

At least inside that room it looked like my party. There were balloons-pink and white. And streamers of the same color. There was a table set up with a pink table cloth that held a variety of foods. Chocolate covered pretzels, steamed veggies, baked mostaccioli, baked and seasoned shrimp, mini-hot dogs and more. There were four large bowls of soda and juice and at the vary end was a chocolate fountain and cotton candy machine. I walked to the fountain and machine and saw a small hand written note.

_I made sure your mother ordered these for you my princess._

At least he got that right. Music was playing and I looked around the room to see Lola, Greer, Kenna and Leith.

"Mary! You're finally here!" Kenna ran forward, taking me in her arms.

"Sorry, my mom held me up in there."

"It's okay. We were all talking." Lola said in my ear.

"Happy birthday!" Greer handed me a gift bag.

"Thank you. And thank you guys for all coming. I know this is probably really lame."

Leith shrugged. "Naw, it's fun. Francis and all of them will be here soon."

I nodded and moved over to the table that held gift on it, placing Greer's with the others. The table was full with gifts from my father's associates. I began to wonder what kind of gifts they were. Would they be generic gifts anyone would give to a ten year old or would they have some thought behind them? I doubt that anyone even really knows much about me to give a gift of any meaning.

As the music continued to play my friends gathered around me in the center of the room as we swirled and threw our hands in the air. For a moment I was able to forget the disappointment from before. But just a moment. As the song switched from Avril to N*SYNC I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. I spun around to see a pool of blue eyes looked down at me.

"Francis! You're here!" He pulled me to his chest.

"Sorry we're late, Claude didn't like her dress. Speaking of dresses..." He pulled back and wiggled his eye brows at me.

"Not another word. I'm glad you're here." The silent look I sent him, he understood.

"I know." He nodded, understanding my heartbreak. "We can talk about that later. Now it is about you." He smiled down at me, his blonde curls falling in his eyes.

"Move out of the way already." Bash said, pushing Francis aside. "Some of us would also like a chance with the birthday girl."

"Well sorry!" Francis threw his hands up, "We will talk about it later okay? Before I leave?" I nodded and he moved to the food table.

"Hello birthday girl."

"Hey Bash." He pulled me in for a hug before handing me off to Elisabeth. I quickly made my way through the Valois children before returning to the dance floor.

An hour of dancing and eating and laughing passed before the library door opened once again. My mother stepped in with a young girl around my age. Her blonde hair fell in front of her hands were fisting her pale purple dress.

"Mary, children. This is Oliva. She is the daughter of one of your father's new partners." She moved Olivia further into the room before leaving once again.

I left the group of kids and moved to the library entrance. "Hi. I'm Mary." Her eyes slowly looked up at me before taking in the rest of the room, landing and staying in one corner.

She moved past me without a word and I turned to see her moving to the corner she had been staring at.

There stood Francis and Leith. She moved past Leith and stared up at Francis, eyes captivated.

I felt my stomach drop and I couldn't figure out why.

Was it all the shrimp I ate?

Another two hours passed and the party was ending. I said goodbye to my friends and Olivia and made my way towards Francis, thankful he would be spending the night.

I had barely gotten a chance to see him after Olivia arrived, she had him tied up all night.

"Are you ready to go upstairs? I'm tired and will just shower tomorrow." Francis nodded and followed me upstairs.

My parents had disappeared as they did after every party. What would make my birthday any different?

"How did you like the party?" Francis asked, already in his pajamas.

I shrugged. "I wish I could have spent more time with you but you were with Olivia all night. What did you guys talk about all night anyway?"

It was his turn to shrug. "Not much."

"You spent all night talking to her and didn't talk about much?"

"I don't know Mary. We just talked. Is that okay or do I _have_ to spend every minute talking to _just_ you?"

I was taken aback. The tone of Francis' voice shocked me. It wasn't as if we never fought before but this time felt different.

I stayed silent.

"Did you want to talk about the party or not?"

I laid back and turned to my side. "No, whatever. Maybe you should sleep in the guest room tonight or something. I just, I don't feel well."

I heard Francis sigh behind me as he pushed out of the blankets.

Nothing else was said as I heard his feet make their way across my room and the door close.

Tears began to flow as I stared at the picture Francis gave me years before. It sat on my bedside table as a reminder of the friendship we held.

I closed my eyes and hoped for sleep to come.

* * *

 

_For the first time Francis wasn't the one holding me during my heartbreak. He was the one causing it._

 


	3. Age 10

_It's amazing how one lie can change your life. For better or worse._

_I mean, lies are told everyday. You lie to yourself, you lie to others. You just. Lie. Poems and songs are written about lies, movies and televisions shows are centered on them._

_So when you take the time to truly think about it, lies impact so much of daily life. It shouldn't be surprising that telling one, no matter how simple, can change the course of history._

_One simple lie changed so much for Francis and I. Or maybe it was more than that. Looking back there were a lot of lies told between us that changed so much._

_But it all started with one- "I'm fine."_

* * *

 

Age 10

Things were tense between Francis and I after my birthday. A week later found us barely talking.

When I woke up the morning after my party I was expecting to see Francis in his room or even in the kitchen. I thought he would apologize for the night before and I would do the same and everything would be better. But that's not what happened.

Francis wasn't in the room he slept in and he wasn't in the kitchen or in any room of the house.

When I asked Ginny if she had seen him, she told me my father brought him home already.

That was that.

No goodbye, no apology. Not even a note saying goodbye. Just nothing.

He texted me telling me that Bash would be coming by to drop off the gifts they didn't bring to my party that was it.

A week later I felt myself getting fed up. He was my best friend. I couldn't understand what was wrong. What I had done wrong.

All I had done was ask about Olivia, I couldn't understand why he got so upset. I was mulling over the distance between us, pushing aside the oatmeal Ginny made for me when my mother walked into the kitchen.

"Mary, go upstairs and pack. Your father and I will be going to Scotland for a week and Catherine and Henry agreed to allow you to stay with them. You'll be leaving this afternoon."

I was filled with mixed feelings. I would finally be seeing Francis again and he would actually be forced to talk to me. But what if he didn't want to? What if this was the end of our friendship and he didn't want to talk to me anymore?

I felt my stomach drop at the thought and looked up to find my mother staring at me. Realizing she was waiting for an answer I silently nodded and pushed back from my chair. I wasn't hungry anyway.

"Why are you guys going to Scotland anyway? I thought daddy didn't have any meetings for another month."

"He doesn't. We are taking a family vacation."

Oh.

* * *

 

Francis wasn't home when I got to the Valois house. Catherine smiled down at me, little Charles in her arms and hurried me inside, suitcase dragging behind me.

"No Ginny this time Mary?" She asked, bringing me into the kitchen.

"No. Not this time." My voice sounded so quiet, so foreign to even me. It must have shaken Catherine to hear it as her head snapped down at me, eyes concerned. Despite the feelings of neglect and isolation I felt whenever my parents left me behind, I had always held onto some optimism. Being with Francis and his family, being with a family actually enjoyed having me around, that appreciated and loved me always gave me some hope. But this time, no matter how hard I tried. I couldn't feel that hope. Was it because of the fight Francis and I had? Was it because we had barely talked over the week? Maybe.

But maybe it was something else.

Maybe it was because of the feelings that had been stirring within me lately. For months things had been different. Where before seeing Francis always made me smile, always made me brighten up; lately I was feeling...different. Seeing him brought butterflies to my stomach. It made my cheeks warm and turn pink. It made my heart beat faster. I would find myself daydreaming about his smile, about his blonde curls and about the way his voice sounded as he told me about the things he did during the day.

When I asked Ginny about everything that I was feeling, she told me that they were the signs of a crush. That I liked someone as more than just a friend.

When she asked who I was talking about, I refused to tell her, already internally freaking out about what she told me.

Could she be right? Francis was always my best friend. But was I starting to look at him as more than that?

The thought scared me. What if Francis didn't feel that same way? I couldn't lose him or our friendship. But I was starting to feel like maybe it was too late for that.

Catherine's voice pulled me from my thoughts, "Are you alright darling?"

I nodded, "I just haven't been feeling well as of late. Would it be okay if I go upstairs and lay down for a bit?"

"Of course. I can bring you up some soup later."

I nodded silently and pulled myself and my bag up the stairs, past Bash's room, past Claude's, past Francis' and into the room across from his. The room designated as mine whenever I would stay over but never used. Something told me I would be using it this time.

As I began unpacking my belongings I began to think back on what my mother told me.

They were going on a vacation. A family vacation.

The look on my mother's face when she said that, it was like she didn't understand how the words would hurt me. Or she didn't care. She rushed me out of the house so quickly, I never even got to talk to my father, to tell him goodbye.

I pulled the last of my items from my suitcase, the photo of Francis and I. It didn't feel right not to bring it with me. The moment I sat it on the table, I heard a knock at the door. Spinning around I saw a mop of brown hair peaking through the crack.

"May I come in?"

"Bash. Yeah come in."

Bash walked through the threshold of the door and dramatically spread his arms out to his sides, falling face first into the bed. "Mmmfsj sjsjuul lssh Mryfs?" It's moments like this where I would forget that Bash was almost three years older than me. He was going to be thirteen but acted younger than Francis and I sometimes.

"What?" I laughed at him, face pressed firmly into the mattress.

His head popped up. "I said, Mmmfsj sjsjuul lssh Mryfs."

"Bash." I whined.

He chuckled at my annoyance and leaned forward, elbows on his knees, hands cupping his face. "How are you?"

I shrugged. "I'm okay."

He nodded. He and I may not be as close and Francis and I but Bash still knew and understood a lot of my feelings. He had his own feelings of abandonment and longing when it came to family. He was born before Henry and Catherine were married, but not long before so. His mother being an ex-girlfriend of Henry's. They conceived Bash when Henry was engaged to Catherine and it caused a lot of tension between the adults. When he was only one year old his mom dropped him off with Henry for a weekend visit and never came back. When he was six Henry received papers from Diane, Bash's mother ending her parental rights.

It was something that always hurt Bash. The thought that his mother didn't want him, didn't want to be his mother.

Despite how it seemed, his presence hurt the relationship between Henry and Catherine. He was always a reminder of Henry's affair.

Bash told me once that he caught Catherine staring at him, almost glaring. When she realized he was looking at her, she shook her head, almost as if she was shaking away the hateful thoughts and smiled at him, encouraging him to play with his siblings-her children.

"I may not be as good a listener as Francis but I'm always here you know."

"I know." I mumbled.

Looking around, feigning shock. "Where is Francis anyway."

"He's at the Lourve with Olivia and her family."

My head snapped up at his words. "Olivia?"

"Yeah. He met her at your party and they've hanging out everyday since."

"Everyday?" It took everything in me not to squeak out the word.

"Well almost everyday." He paused, "You didn't know that? I thought you would have been with them."

"No. I didn't know."

Silence surrounded us. Awkward tense silence.

"Well did you want to talk about it? Whatever's bothering you I mean?"

If only he knew how much was bothering me. My parents, Francis, the stupid butterflies that started up when I just heard his name, the sinking feeling when I hear his name and Olivia's together.

I shrug. "It's just, the same old thing. Being pushed aside as my mother and father do their own thing. Together. And I am left behind as always. They're in Scotland again this time. I figured it was for something for work, that's where dad's headquarters are anyway. But nope," I put an extra pop on the 'p', "Mother told me that it is for a vacation. A family vacation. That is the exact phrase she used. Family vacation. Forgive me, but I thought I was their daughter. That I was part of the..."My voice cracked and so did my resolve. The tears started pouring down my cheeks and I could feel the sobs begin to build in my chest. "family." I pushed myself to finish.

Bash had moved forward, pulling me into his arms, one hand rubbing my back and one cradling my head.

It was comfort that I was seeking but it wasn't the comfort I was seeking.

I wanted Francis and the comfort and protection that only he could provide but he wasn't there.

He hadn't been there in a week.

"They don't know how amazing you are Mary. And if they don't see that then they don't deserve to call you their daughter because you deserve so much more."

I hiccuped at his words and pulled back to wipe my cheeks.

"My mom doing this I can understand. I'm ten Bash and for years I have known that she sees me as nothing more than an accessory. Something to carry beside her and garner attention. No child should feel that way when they think about their mother. So her doing these things doesn't surprise me. I don't know if she even loves me. But my father. He was never like this. He used to tell me everyday that he loved me. Whenever he would go on these trips he would hold me in his arms for at least ten minutes before leaving. He would call me everyday, no matter what. No I barely see him when he is home and when he goes away, I don't ever talk to him. He brings me back gifts, hoping to buy my love, hoping that I would forget. He still calls me his princess, like that means anything anymore."

Bash pulled me back into his arms, "Does Francis know about any of this?"

"I mean he knows some. Things have gotten worse between my parents and I lately and he doesn't know about any that."

"Why not?"

"I haven't had the chance to tell him. It all got bad after my birthday and Francis and I haven't talked since then. I didn't know why before but now I guess it's because he's been hanging out with Olivia. I just...I miss him Bash. I miss my best friend and I want him back. I feel so alone."

Another sob escaped me and buried my head in his shoulder.

"I will always be here for you Mary. You will never be alone."

And somehow, despite not being extremely close, Bash managed to say exactly what I needed to hear. He managed to break through my shield and his words touched me in the exact way that I needed.

"Thanks."

I buried my head deeper in his shoulder as his arms tightened around me.

"So what's going on here?"

Bash and I shot apart at the interruption and I looked at Francis standing in the doorway, a look on his face that I hadn't seen before, a look I couldn't explain.

"Ah. You're finally home. While I may be a good shoulder to cry on I am only temporary and you are far better. I will leave you two to do whatever it is you do." Bash stood up and moved towards the door, sending me a wink as a reminder to what he said.

I will never be alone.

"So you wanna tell me what's going on? Why were you and Bash hugging like that?"

I shrugged and looked away, wiping the tears from my face. There was once a time where Francis would rush to me I he even thought that I was going to cry, he always knew if I had cried even if it was hours later. Yet here he was, able to see the tears stain my cheeks and he ignored that.

"I'll be here for a week. My parents are in Scotland. On a family vacation."

He sighed.

"Oh."

"And when I got here, you weren't. Bash came in to say hi and he saw I was upset and..."

He moved towards me and took the place on the bed Bash had previously been filling.

"And he listened because I wasn't here to. I'm sorry I wasn't here Mary. I'm sorry I wasn't there after your birthday either. I know that you wanted to talk but..." He kept talking, or he wanted to keep talking but I interrupted.

"It's okay. I'm fine."

Things got better between us after that. Francis spent everyday with me during the week I was at their house.

We took our lessons together, both being home schooled and ended up sleeping in my room every night. It felt like old times.

Francis sat patiently as I told him everything I felt during and after my party regarding my parents. He told me about how things have been tough between his own. They were fighting more lately. I told him about how alone I had been feeling and he pulled me close promising to make sure I never felt that way again.

Each day we would walk with his nanny through the streets of Paris, chasing each other through trees, dancing and jumping in the pond in his yard. Being us.

But there was something that was bothering me during it all.

Well two things.

The first being those butterflies.

They were always present and were making themselves more obvious the more time I spent with Francis. I was surprised one didn't make its way from my belly and fly from my mouth, they were getting so strong. I could only hope that Francis didn't notice. I couldn't lose his friendship and I knew that would happen if I told him about my feelings.

And the second thing was Olivia.

Francis hadn't mentioned her once during the week we were together and I was too afraid to bring her up after the fight we had my party.

After all that night all I asked was what they talked about. If I brought up the fact the he ditched me for a week to spend time with her he would think I was just jealous.

Maybe I was.

The last night that I was spending at the Valois house was spent over handmade pizza that Catherine aided all of the kids in making-we each were allowed to make our own, and movies that Elisabeth and Claude picked out. After two Disney Princess movies Francis pulled me up to his bedroom, bidding everyone a night.

"If I have to watch Mulan one more time I may jump out a window." Francis fell backward onto his bed.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad. I'll make a man out of you is a really good song."

"Whatever." He muttered.

A silence fell across the room. But it wasn't awkward. It was comfortable. It was us. I decided to take a risk

"Can I ask you something Francis?" I stared at me hands in my lap as I sat on the bed beside where he was lounging.

He rolled over onto his side and propped his head on his hand.

"Anything."

"Have-have you ever had a crush on anyone?"

He was silent a moment. "Y-yeah. W-why?"

"I just-I think I have one on someone and I just don't know what to do."

"Well who is it?"

My eyes got wide at I looked at him. "I can't tell you that."

"Well why not? I'm your best friend. You have to tell me. Besides now that I know you have a crush on someone I won't ever leave you alone till you tell me."

I shook my head.

"Come on. If you tell me who you have a crush on I will tell you who I have a crush on."

"No Francis. I don't want to."

He leaned up and put his hands on my cheeks. "Pweeease?"

I rolled my eyes. I couldn't tell him could I? I mean, if I did that would change everything. I would ruin our friendship and I would lose him forever, like I lost my parents. I couldn't bare the thought of losing the most important person in my life so I did the only thing I could think of.

I lied.

"Okay, it's-it's Bash."

He pulled his hands from my cheeks and his face changed from the playful one he had before to a face of stone.

"Oh well. I know that he doesn't have a crush on you, so that's just pointless."

A few seconds of silence.

"Mine is Olivia by the way. Since you told me. I have a crush on Olivia. We are gonna hang out again once your parents get back. We weren't able to when you were here but..."

"Oh. Okay."

Those butterflies were replaced by something else now. A sinking stone-like feeling that started in my chest and fell through my stomach.

Francis pushed off the bed, moving towards his dresser to pull out some clothes. His shoulders shaking slightly as I watched him from behind.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah. I'm fine."

* * *

 

_It's tough for anyone to pick themselves up after breaking apart and pulling themselves back together, grown up or child. For so long I had Francis beside me, pulling me back up when I fell I didn't know how to do it myself._

_Especially if he was the one that broke me to begin with._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long guys. I've actually had this written for a while, but forgot to post it! Sorry!


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